27.3.17

Why Home Friends Are So Important

Friendships: they grow, they change, they break, and they endure.


In elementary school, you're told to make new friends, but keep the old. But how many of us actually remember actively putting in an effort to make those friends? Playdates were usually set up by our parents, and our friendships were usually a result of who was in our classes.

In middle school, things got cliquey and your social status was determined by how many bar and bat mitzvahs you got invited to (at least, that was the case where I grew up). You worried about who you would sit with in the cafeteria, and whether or not it was actually cool to be in the school band or chorus.


Fast forward to high school and friendships grow stronger; you branch out to new people, and join sports teams that form your friend group. You might go to parties and you might not, but there isn't a lot of time left and you want to make the most of the friends you've got. You worry about who's going to ask you to prom, but in the end it's the group of people you rent a limo with and dance to "Ignition" with that make it a night to remember.

Then you get to college, and sometimes your home friends take a back seat. We're seduced by this idea of meeting new people from other states and countries. We're nervous that if we don't make friends fast, we'll be left behind while everyone else is having a good time and posting the evidence on Instagram. These are supposed to be the best four years of our lives, after all.

We're determined to be best friends with our roommate, or that girl down the hall. In fact, we've already decided that before we even move in. We get the numbers of every person we meet, and two years later end up with contacts in our phone that we barely remember. It's superficial, but it's just another stage in our life. We'll leave some friends behind in first semester, and solidify our friendships through clubs, sports, and classes.

Some people make their best friends in college; others keep their best friends from home. I, for one, feel like I have best friends on both sides of my life. But I've never been one to forget the people I grew up with. After all, I've known some of my friends from home for 15 years.


These past two weeks have been a whirlwind of friends from my hometown visiting me at University. It's been overwhelming, but it also made me realize how much I appreciate my home friends. From cooking dinner and drinking wine together, to having deep conversations on the top of Arthur's Seat, to just reminiscing over our memories of childhood. We truly know each other better than anyone else.

But for us it wasn't just about remembering the funny moments from high school, the embarrassing stories from middle school, or the faintest memories from elementary school. We also talked about the future; where we saw ourselves, how much we think we've changed, and how much we think we've stayed the same.


I think it's funny how I've still maintained such close relationships with my home friends, even after traveling across an ocean to go to University. Even when most of our communication exists through Snapchat or tagging each other in Instagram posts, I feel like when we see each other, we always jump right back to where we left off.

Of course, my friendship group has gotten significantly smaller since graduation, but I think this has allowed for my existing friendships to grow even stronger. There's always room for a few more friends, but nothing can diminish the history that you've shared with people you've known for the majority of your life.

So here's to home friends; the ones who know you like no one else, and who I probably couldn't get rid of even if I tried ;)


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